word of the year

In 2009 I named the year- SHINE.  That's what I wanted to do. Shine for Jesus and shine before all men.  I wanted to be the light in others' darkness to help them find the true light.  It was a good year.  I learned a lot. I shined a lot.  It worked.

As 2010 approached I was caught up in me.  I didn't take the time to even consider a word.  I was too busy preparing and praying and getting myself ready for the twins to arrive and for our family to change.   In April, we welcomed the twins and our friends welcomed Lily and then I began to pray more than ever before.  In August, Lily earned her wings and entered heaven's gates.  I became weary in my prayers- and saw a big difference in my life.  So without a formal naming of 2010, I will call it the Year of Prayer.

As 2011 approaches, I feel worn out- working mom of  a 5 1/2 year old and (almost) 9 month old twins, wife, daughter, sister, friend.  I feel like their is never enough of me or my skills to go around- not enough time or energy.  I get unsatisfied with the way the day ends- melt into my bed while reading books to my oldest dreaming of the 101 things left to accomplish.  We haven't been as diligent about teaching our family to be Christ-like and right now I feel far from it myself- snapping at children, bossing my husband around, secret disappointments hiding in my heart, building into bitterness.  I want more of me, more of them- I want to connect with my Maker, my husband, my family, my friends.  I need portion control.  So, in my quest for a word I consider- depend, conquest, grace, joy, humility, change, patience, attend, yield, simplify, being, portion, pursue... all good words.  So I think my word for the year will be connecting.
This year I want to connect with the people that I say are important to me and the God who is bigger and more deserving of worship than all the rest.

My goal and my aim:

to live passionately,

to walk purposefully,

to be authentic, and

pursue Christ for all that he’s worth.

lost letters

October 7, 2004

Dear Great-Grandma,
I hope your ankle is feeling better.  Mom has been sharing Grandma Irene's letters with me.  Well school has almost flown by.  Next week will be the last full week before report cards go out.  I'm teaching 3-9th grade classes, 2-7th grade classes and an 8th grade class.  Well, I have finished my shot treatment and went back to the doctor last month.  They are giving me birth control to put the estrogen back in my body.  Next month, I will begin giving myself Follicle Stimulating Hormone (FSH) shots daily to help me ovulate so I can get pregnant.  The doctor said everything looks good.  Originally we thought insurance wouldn't cover the expense of $3500 a month, but since then we found out our cost will be considerably less.  Michal and I are very excited about this next phase.  
We have started going back to the church we were married in.  A few weeks ago we went to a "discovery" class and so we will become members on October 23.  
Last week we (Brooke, Jessica, Mom and I) went to Oklahoma City to try on bridesmaid dresses for Jessica's wedding.  That was very fun.  I even tried on a maternity dress since I could be about 5 months pregnant in May.
Michael's work is going well.  He is the drive-in supervisor and is attending supervisor school at Vo-Tech.  He is learning some interesting ideas.
Next week, I have to go to Tulsa for 2 days, so I can attend Autism training.  I'm excited about the training, but it is so hard getting ready for being gone.  Well, not much else to say.  I hope you and Grandma do well.  Please be careful, so you don't hurt yourself this winter.  
We love You!

Love, 
Amy (&Michael)

I was working on a project for our home-group couples this morning and came across this letter. It was hand- written on beautiful paper, sealed and ready to send- with the exception of the street address.  It was never sent.  In the previous 6 months my Grandpa Mantle had passed away and little did I know that a mere 10 months later (almost exactly), she would be gone too.  I know that in next 10 months that she lived we talked or wrote several times- we even spent time together at my sister's wedding.  But, she never did learn of the birth of my daughter, Evelyn.  She has never seen her picture and heard her name spoken by me.  I didn't call her because she was so sick after Evy was born and she went to be with the Lord when we came home from the hospital.  I didn't attend her funeral, a decision I regret deeply.

As it is sad to know she is no longer here to share my accomplishments and daily activities, I am thankful to be reminded of how far my life has come since October 2004.  The tough journey of infertility was conquered and I have 3 living, breathing, beautiful children and one angel in heaven- probably hearing Old Grandma sing "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine."  I have moved to a different area of teaching, but now am using the training I was preparing to attend.  In the area of church, I have served in various capacities including education planning committee, Sunday school teacher, Kids Konnection coordinator, nursery worker, and now home-group leader.  Since then Michael and I have purchased two businesses and merged them creating A+ Answering Service and Michael is the big boss! (putting that supervisor training to good use)  I laughed when I read about trying on the dresses and remembered how much fun we had- little did we know that I would indeed be 5/6 months pregnant at the wedding.

I am thankful for that little lost letter- and I am reminded that I should be taking more time to connect with my living Grandparents and friends.  This past year has been full of heartbreak for families who have lost relatives.  I think of many who have lost daughters, fathers, wives and husbands.  We never know what tomorrow will bring.  I think we should be living more like today may be the last!  Oh, how that will change my life and probably yours too!

Merry Christmas

 

We celebrated the birth of Jesus this week.  It was interesting preparing for Christmas with 3 children.  I am way more respectful of my parents getting around and making sure everyone had equal presents.  The twins are into everything and I had hoped they would love to rip open paper- but as everyone told me...they liked the boxes and bows better. It was great to celebrate with both our families- even though most of my clan felt sick.  We ended up leaving early from my sisters to sleep in our own beds earlier than we had planned.  

I hope everyone enjoyed a MERRY CHRISTMAS and are looking forward to a HAPPY NEW YEAR!

{eight months}

Oh, darlings.

You are eight months old and you are so much fun!
Here's a quick list of what you've been up to this past month:

Madelyn

You started pulling yourself up on anything
and exploring/grabbing/nabbing everything.
Nothing is out of your reach anymore.

Everything goes into your mouth,
which is forcing me to vacuum a little more frequently.
I have become a pro at digging things out of those cheeks of yours.

You are crawling everywhere.
You scoot ahead half walking half crawling.
It works because you can get yourself across the room pretty fast.
You are even starting to explore cruising furniture...won't be long and you'll be running.


Jackson
You are so curious.
You have to check everything out,
which often leads to a bump or bruise.

You mastered crawling first- even the stairs are
no match for you. You love climbing up onto things,
which often leads to another bump or bruise.

You talk and pound your hands a lot.
Dada and Mama are your favorite words to say.
You love to play and make people laugh.

You both still don't have teeth but love to eat.
Cheerios and banana yogurt are your favorites.

You got your first tummy bug and fevers this month.
You braved the long car ride to St. Louis and enjoyed your first vacation.

You're growing and changing and loving and delighting!
Happy eight months, sweet babies!

Weekend Recap

This weekend we went to St. Louis to visit my family and attend my cousin's wedding. It was a lot of fun. The drive took about 10+ hours to complete with a good number of stops for restroom breaks/diaper changes and stretching. We were able to steal some time and go visit the arch. The walk to the arch was beautiful- but cold. We were able to see some pretty cool buildings. We wish we could have taken time to go through the museaum, but we needed to get back to the hotel to eat and get changed before the wedding.







The hero of the day award goes to my wonderful, amazing and more-obsrvant-than-I-give-him-credit-for husband who realized that Evy's blanket got left and went back to the hotel to pick it up- long story short is that we had a free hotel room from Michael's birthday and it couldn't be used at the same place as the reception- so we stayed in two different hotels- 15 miles apart.

We had a good time at the wedding. We stuffed the babies with "snacks" so they didn't mind sitting for 50 minutes being quiet. It was fun to watch Ryan and his parents and Stephanie and her parents during the event. The pastor also had some good things to say about marriage. After almost 12 years...Michael and I still have a few things to learn. Madelyn refused to nap between wedding and reception- so she slept through it. Michael took the babies and Evy back to the room for a "pizza party" and I stayed to visit. We met a meterologist from the St. Louis news and he had some interesting questions about tornados...I guess Oklahomans are considered experts?




Another 10 hours back with an hour stop in Tulsa and we were home. But...Jackson puked in the car as we turned the corner on to our street. I was hoping for motion sickness, but several outfits later and a high fever- we were dealing with a stomach bug. I spent Monday and Tuesday changing diapers and cleaning up sick kids. I am thankful so far that Madelyn has not puked or got the yucky diapers and is just running a fever. I am also very thankful for this to be a bug rather than an issue related to his hydrocele which would require emergency surgery.

So a great weekend ended with not so great circumstances but I am so thankful for the opportunity to go spend some time with my grandma, uncle and family.

It goes like this...

In August, for a couple weeks- both babies slept through the night (STTN). I was so excited. School was starting and I was getting some much needed rest. Evy never really STTN until like 18+months, so this was cool. Then they got a cold right as school started. They quit sttn. We have battled 4-6 wake ups between them each night. They scream and aren't really comforted until they drink milk. Nutritionally, they aren't suppose to "need" bottles in the middle of the night now. They won't take their pacifier anymore, so they get a bottle and more sleep.

For the last few nights, Jackson hasn't cried much or needed a bottle during the night and Madelyn has only had 1 (about 3am) instead of 2. I can see that we might be crossing over again to sttn. This bit of news is more exciting because I will no longer be living in sin- being jealous of several "new" moms who have bragged that their little guys are sttn at like 6 weeks- ugh! Anyway, I am not getting my hopes up because we will be heading to St. Louis at the end of the week for a wedding. There will be hours in the car, hotels rooms with 6 people in them, new folks to meet, ruined routines and most of all an interruption in sttn.

My prayers (and hopefully yours too) will be that they will be uninterrupted by this trip and will continue to be their happy, unsick selves, who are sleeping through the night.

Moms of multiples are freaks of nature

This is sometimes what it feels like to be me...although I definitely could add a few lines.